Spooky
I think I speak for all of us when I say that if all airlines had flight safety cards recounting the adventures of glowing red ghost terrorists, we'd probably read them more.
My Russian is a little rusty, but I think I've managed to translate some of the more straightforward panels...
If your flight is hijacked by glowing red ghost terrorists, just ignore them.
If you're a single woman in a short red dress, attempt to chat up the terrorist. He's probably not such a bad guy, and let's face it, honey; you're not getting any younger.
Men react with alarm, women with curiosity. It's one of those Mars/Venus things.
Hijackings can be, like, super boring.
If you're a gay man and your boyfriend has recently given you an engagement ring, show it to the terrorist. Everybody loves diamonds.
When escaping the aircraft, let the members of The Wiggles go first. They're richer than you, and probably more important to your children.
Once you are off the plane, run away from the glowing green ghost soldiers. Do not stop to wonder why your plane doesn't have any wings.
My Russian is a little rusty, but I think I've managed to translate some of the more straightforward panels...
If your flight is hijacked by glowing red ghost terrorists, just ignore them.
If you're a single woman in a short red dress, attempt to chat up the terrorist. He's probably not such a bad guy, and let's face it, honey; you're not getting any younger.
Men react with alarm, women with curiosity. It's one of those Mars/Venus things.
Hijackings can be, like, super boring.
If you're a gay man and your boyfriend has recently given you an engagement ring, show it to the terrorist. Everybody loves diamonds.
When escaping the aircraft, let the members of The Wiggles go first. They're richer than you, and probably more important to your children.
Once you are off the plane, run away from the glowing green ghost soldiers. Do not stop to wonder why your plane doesn't have any wings.
posted by Blandwagon at 6:07 PM
3 Comments:
Brilliant! It's so good, I sent a copy to my mother.
I'm afraid I had to take full credit, however. Sorry.
Fantastic! Will have to remember to wear a short red dress next time I'm flying somewhere. Red isn't really my colour though...
If you're a gay man and your boyfriend has recently given you an engagement ring, show it to the terrorist. Everybody loves diamonds.
That was my favourite bit :D
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