Sunday, April 03, 2016

Appearances

I had my Saturday breakfast at Pillar of Salt, where the beautiful people of Richmond come for their acai bowls and skinny decaf lattes. The girls flounce about in lululemon outfits with yoga mats strapped to their backs, just in case they suddenly feel the need to adopt the Downward Dog while crossing Church Road. The boys strut, simultaneously flexing and clenching, wearing rumpled sportswear in a way that suggests they spent the previous hour preening, cleansing and artfully tousling to get that “I just fell out of bed and I still look hot” look.


I had some bircher muesli… sorry, Amazon Superfood Bircher Muesli… at the suggestion of my waitress, who was one of those girls for whom everything is a delightful revelation. “You’re here for breakfast? OMG! No, you can totally sit anywhere! Would you like a coffee? Flat white? That’s super! And here’s a menu! Fantastic! Ooh look a puppy! Squeeeee!”


The puppy in question was a pug, of course, because this is Richmond and pugs are the 'it' dogs of the moment. You can’t throw a rock in Richmond without hitting half a dozen pugs, which probably explains why they frown on people throwing rocks in their neighbourhood. No doubt in six months’ time the poor little pugs will be clogging up the animal shelters as the fashionistas switch over to miniature weimaraners or whatever it is that comes in next.


Mind you, Melbourne is a city that loves its second hand stores, so the pugs may just get passed down the hipness ladder to the suburban classes, along with the fiddle leaf fig trees and rustic industrial light fittings.

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