Deserving

On the twelfth day of Blandmas my true love gave to me; a donation to TEAR Australia's Christmas foreign aid fund.


Wait, what the hell? This is supposed to be about me! WHAT PART OF "ME" DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND, TRUE LOVE? I'm the one who's supposed to be getting the gifts here, not some distant bunch of Third World dirtbags! Where are your damn priorities?


Stupid Christmas. Stupid spreading of joy and goodwill. What an appalling state of affairs! I blame my friend (and church elder) OL. Cue the wavy lines and harp strumming of recollection...


Me: I had a bit of a win at work this week. It turns out they've been underpaying me and now I get backpaid nearly two thousand dollars!

OL: That's timely. You know the church is hoping to raise two thousand dollars to build a school for underprivilaged children in Zambia.

Me: ...

OL: ...

Me: D'oh!


At least God let me off with a mere tithing. I still have enough left over to buy that Roomba that I can't conceivably live without.