Advice

Here are two pieces of advice for people suffering from acute torticollis:


1) Don't drive your head forcefully into the door frame of your car while getting out, because it will hurt even more than normal and cause you doubt the wisdom of the Almighty in allowing you to be born.


2) Don't continue to play System Shock II on your computer, especially if you walk through a doorway into an ambush by the undead. The "Ugh!" of surprise almost instantly becomes the "AAAARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!" of extreme pain as you instinctively jerk your head backwards, and your girlish scream will alarm people in neighbouring suburbs, if not neighbouring timezones.