Nescafe

In making myself another cup of mediocre coffee at work this afternoon, I wondered, "Why do I keep my espresso machine at home when I'd get so much more use out of it at work?"

The answer is the same as it always is when I ask myself that question. I keep my espresso machine at home because when I get up on a Saturday or Sunday morning, or come home after a night out, and run through all the little gestures of tamping and frothing and pouring, then sit down with a latte or macchiato or affogatto, it pleasantly burnishes my whole day. It's like yoga. I couldn't bear to lose that.

Also, if we're being honest, my workplace is a very quiet and composed environment, and my espresso machine makes noises like a duck giving birth to a submarine. I can just see what would happen:

My boss (on the phone, using soft telephone voice): I assure you, Mr Bigwig, this department maintains the highest professional standards, and we will get to work on your project with all of our customary discretion and efficiency.

Espresso Machine: WARK! WARK! WARK! PPPFFFFFFFFFFFFTTT! WARK! WARK!

Mr Bigwig: Is that a duck giving birth to a submarine in your office?