Monday, December 13, 2010

Respect (redux)

Fans of schadenfreude and karma will be delighted to know that one can never escape the long arm of the Australian police. Or at least that I can't escape it.

As mentioned a few posts ago, I recently managed to slink my way through a Random Breath Test station while tanked up on champagne. On this matter the police remain blissfully ignorant, or if not blissfully ignorant then just blissfully impotent, which has much the same effect from my perspective.

My success here has been offset, however, by a separate win for my state-sponsored nemeses. They have brought all of their advanced technology to the fore and managed to catch me in a speed trap. Reckless maniac that I am, I was doing 99kph in a 90 zone, while driving to a house party in the country.

I'd thought that the posted 90 limit was some sort of printing error, since the trap was on a quiet rural backroad that should have been, under any sensible scheme, a standard 110 zone. But apprarently not. The cynic might believe that the absurdly low limit was actually a cunning ruse to tempt drivers into speeding - if doing 99kph on a paved country road can be sanely classed as "speeding" - but said cynic would not be adhering to the spirit of road safety.

The bustling metropolitan thoroughfare in question, clearly bristling with the schools, side streets and invisible dinosaurs that require the speed limit to be low and strictly enforced.

Fortunately the speeding citation only carried a $75 fine and no loss of demerit points, which is good, because I don't have many points left and I shudder at the thought of not having a license. But happily that day of automotive crisis has not yet come, and I can still legally cause fear and consternation on the roads. Or at least as much fear and consternation as one can create with a dinky little convertible and a bright yellow scooter.


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