Tuesday, October 28, 2008


This is what I get for putting my email address on the entry form in an attempt to win a new scooter:

Hi Blandwagon,

I hope you had a great weekend, we did!!

Congratulations to all of you that took part, helped or sponsored all the Fantastic people that took part in the Triathlon Pink this weekend in Perth.

There are fantastic people, and then there are Fantastic people. And then there are people who don’t know the difference between “that” and “who”.

Every fortnightly I'll be sending you a personal Success Tip, which will be packed with exciting news, new tips and techniques to help you.

Thanks! Every fortnightly I’ll be sending you a personal Grammar Tip, which will be packed with exciting news, new tips and techniques to help you construct meaningful sentences. We'll begin with "Proofreading: Your Gateway to Not Sounding Like a Dumbass".

This week, you can read all about how Siimon Reynolds one of Australia's best known advertising experts, has been able to Accelerate his knowledge of business and his understanding of life.

Meanwhile I'll continue your personal Grammar Tip with something I like to call “Adventures in Parentheses (Putting Your Commas Where They Count!)”. Then we’ll move on to “Dude, You’re Not A German: How and Where to Use Capital Letters”.

To read it, go to:

And every fortnight I'll be sending you another great new Success Tip, so you can continue learning new ways to get ahead in all areas of your life.

Success Tip #1: If you need to spam people to get your message across, your message probably sucks.

All the best,

Rob Orriss
Absolute Success Arena
PO Box 3016 Joondalup WA 6027
P: +61 8 9405 6927
F: +61 8 9405 7852
E: rob@AbsoluteSuccessArena.com

P.S. Remember, to take a look at all our latest uploads.

Go, to Hell.


Blogger emawkc said...

Are you sure you want to give up this opportunity for absolute success?

I mean, it's absolute! ABSOLUTE I TELL YOU!

12:57 PM  
Blogger Iris Flavia said...

good, One!

1:42 PM  
Blogger Blandwagon said...

Let us recall the famous dictum of Lord Acton, emawkc. "Success tends to annoy; absolute success annoys absolutely. Successful men are almost always utter wankers."

Although I may be misremembering that slightly.

Also thank, You iris flavia!

2:08 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That was hilarious. However, I am now most concerned about my grammar in posting my comments. Because , lets face it, I'm Crap at that stuff.

On the other matter: I like to put really crazy names on forms and love it when I get letters or emails addressed to Reverend Jaymez, The Sexual Enlightenment Clinic. In one case I had an email addressed: "Dear Cunt Face". Made me laugh because I had forgotten all about doing that one.


8:39 PM  

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