Scoot
When you do the sums, getting to work is no cheap matter. At current petrol prices, it costs me about $3.50 to drive the Golf to and from work each day (plus another $1.20 for parking, if I paid for parking like I'm supposed to instead of utilising a loophole that could be closed at any second). Catching the bus costs just over $4, and takes around two and a half hours a day. So, what's the solution for the man with limited finances, a busy lifestyle and no sense of dignity?
The answer is a 2004 Vmoto Milan JX50 motor scooter.
Mine is bronze, has 2,200km on the clock, and buzzes like an angry lawnmower. I collected it last night from a motorcycle dealership in Victoria Park. The dealer was a pleasant enough fellow, but he looked a little nervous as I jumped onto my bike and prepared to take off. The fact that I didn't know how to fasten a helmet or operate the kickstand had no doubt convinced him that I was going to roar out of his showroom and straight under the wheels of a passing semi-trailer. I loftily informed him that I ridden semi-automatic 'postie bikes' back on the farm, and although that was fifteen years ago and the paddocks were oddly devoid of speeding semi-trailers, it was experience nonetheless.
My sums reveal that riding it to work instead of taking my car will save me over $600 a year, more if the parking inspectors at work realise that I've been getting free car parking for years and decide to enforce the $300 annual car parking levy. But beyond the finances, there are other issues. I was weighing up the pros and cons in my mind, and I kept coming back to one con: if I'm going down the highway at full speed, and a car suddenly pulls out in front of me, I will be toast. And not good delicious toast - I'm talking stale, manky toast that's been burnt on one side and has to be scraped with a knife to make it even partly presentable. There are no seatbelts, rollbars, airbags or crumple zones on a scooter. The only standing between me and the bitumen is a helmet and a thin layer of business suit.
I think it was this con that, ironically enough, eventually tipped the scales in favour of buying the scooter. To be honest, I realised that if I'm such a panty-waisted wuss-boy that I'm too scared to ride a 50cc girly-man motor scooter, let alone a high-speed 500cc motorbike, then I DO NOT DESERVE TO CALL MYSELF A MAN! So what if I risk coming off my scooter and splattering across the side of a badly-driven Toyota Landcruiser? I might get hit by a bus crossing the road on foot. I could choke on a cashew. My new flatmate may well go postal over my failure to do my share of the washing up and kill me with a satay-encrusted frying pan. That doesn't mean I should avoid crossing roads, eating nuts or fleeing a dirty kitchen. It's not the manly way.
There is a significant pro, too, to counter the most conspicuous con, but it's one that I didn't discover until I'd taken a test ride:
SCOOTERS ARE WICKED FUN!
Maybe this particular reason will lose its potency sooner rather than later, but until then, it may be the best reason to keep riding the thing.
The answer is a 2004 Vmoto Milan JX50 motor scooter.
Mine is bronze, has 2,200km on the clock, and buzzes like an angry lawnmower. I collected it last night from a motorcycle dealership in Victoria Park. The dealer was a pleasant enough fellow, but he looked a little nervous as I jumped onto my bike and prepared to take off. The fact that I didn't know how to fasten a helmet or operate the kickstand had no doubt convinced him that I was going to roar out of his showroom and straight under the wheels of a passing semi-trailer. I loftily informed him that I ridden semi-automatic 'postie bikes' back on the farm, and although that was fifteen years ago and the paddocks were oddly devoid of speeding semi-trailers, it was experience nonetheless.
My sums reveal that riding it to work instead of taking my car will save me over $600 a year, more if the parking inspectors at work realise that I've been getting free car parking for years and decide to enforce the $300 annual car parking levy. But beyond the finances, there are other issues. I was weighing up the pros and cons in my mind, and I kept coming back to one con: if I'm going down the highway at full speed, and a car suddenly pulls out in front of me, I will be toast. And not good delicious toast - I'm talking stale, manky toast that's been burnt on one side and has to be scraped with a knife to make it even partly presentable. There are no seatbelts, rollbars, airbags or crumple zones on a scooter. The only standing between me and the bitumen is a helmet and a thin layer of business suit.
I think it was this con that, ironically enough, eventually tipped the scales in favour of buying the scooter. To be honest, I realised that if I'm such a panty-waisted wuss-boy that I'm too scared to ride a 50cc girly-man motor scooter, let alone a high-speed 500cc motorbike, then I DO NOT DESERVE TO CALL MYSELF A MAN! So what if I risk coming off my scooter and splattering across the side of a badly-driven Toyota Landcruiser? I might get hit by a bus crossing the road on foot. I could choke on a cashew. My new flatmate may well go postal over my failure to do my share of the washing up and kill me with a satay-encrusted frying pan. That doesn't mean I should avoid crossing roads, eating nuts or fleeing a dirty kitchen. It's not the manly way.
There is a significant pro, too, to counter the most conspicuous con, but it's one that I didn't discover until I'd taken a test ride:
SCOOTERS ARE WICKED FUN!
Maybe this particular reason will lose its potency sooner rather than later, but until then, it may be the best reason to keep riding the thing.
posted by Blandwagon at 6:01 PM
2 Comments:
I'm a little curious about the effects of this particular vehicle on members of the opposite sex. On one hand, you are dinking around on a dimiutive pygmy motorbike. On the other, you're saving tons of gas and risking your life in the most masculine way possible, short of playing Russian roulette with a semiautomatic.
I guess it all boils down to this: do you wear sunglasses like these, or the ones on the Vmoto website?
Well, I spelled "diminutive" wrong and it's redundant -- BUT I STAND BY IT.
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